BREAKING POINT

Jeremy drew her back beside him with superior strength.

“Now calm down, darling” he said easily. “I am very grateful to him for taking care of you but I can help being a little jealous, can I?”

Penny looked at him, her temper and animosity melting.

“Jealous? Of Joey? Oh Jeremy, darling, have you been jealous?” she asked.

“What do you think?” Jeremy asked, burying his face against her hair sniffing behind her ear in that well mannered way. “Mmmm, you smell good”

She was ready to fall into his arms but she must know first… About the girl in white.

“Jeremy?”

“Mmm?”

“Who was the ‘old friend’. I’m not really being inquisitive and of course I know it isn’t really any of my business, but I love you so much I want to know all about you… Everything. Please satisfy my curiosity”

Jeremy crushed his cigarette and drew away from her, picking up his whisky glass.

“If you must know, it was my father’s secretary” he said

The blonde was Mr Gilbert’s secretary, Penny wondered.

“Jeremy, is she very pretty?”

His mouth took on an obstinate line.

“Well, isn’t she?”

“Yes” he replied

She had never realized before how one word could be so expressive of a mood. Jeremy was furiously angry but she did not mind. She had made him tell her at last. She was completely in control of her emotions and Jeremy had lost his temper. For the moment she had the upper hand.

“As your fiancée, I think I might well object to your taking out another girl” she said with enforced lightness.

“You can object all you want to” Jeremy shot at her, “But I will continue to take out who I want, when I want. If you don’t like it then you can count me out of your life and get out quick, my dear”

You asked for it, Penny told herself. It’s your own fault. Keep calm. Don’t lose your temper, too.

“You seem to forget you are asking me to get out of my own flat” she said coldly. She wanted to hurt him. He should pay for last night.

Jeremy jumped to his feet, his face red and angry. “Thank you very much. Since you make it quite clear how you feel. I will get out… And stay out”

No. No. He mustn’t go. She had never meant for this to happen. She had gone too far. She couldn’t let Jeremy go.

“Jeremy” she called.Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

He walked past her into the hall and began to struggle into his coat. Penny ran after him and caught his arm. Fear that he was really going tore the remnants of her pride.

“No Jeremy, don’t go. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. Honestly, darling. I love you. I love you terribly. I was just jealous… Horribly jealous of seeing you with her. I didn’t know who it was”

“Seeing me with her?” Jeremy asked.

It was out now.

“Yes I saw you. I came to the Savoy to surprise you. I didn’t know she would be there with you. I’m sorry, darling. I’m terribly sorry. Only don’t leave me, please”

“Now I’m beginning to understand” Jeremy said, staring at her. “No wonder you were so curious”

“Yes I was jealous. I had to know. I should have just asked you” the words tumbled out without control.

Suddenly Jeremy laughed. Surprise held her for a moment, then relief, then reaction. She started laughing with him and before long she was laughing and crying at once and Jeremy was carrying her into the bedroom and laying her down among the pillows.

“I’m going to get us both a drink *he told her and went into the kitchen.

Penny stopped laughing and crying and wiped the tears away with the edge of the sheet.

‘That was hysteria’ she thought. ‘I have never been hysterical before… Yes, once, when I was a little girl and uncle and aunt made me send my other Benjamin away. Aunt Ann slapped my face and put me to bed. I thought she was cross when she slapped me but I know now that it is done to shock the person back to normal. It must be that flu or whatever I had in Cornwall

.. Or the baby… Oh the baby… I still haven’t told Jeremy. I can’t tell him now. I couldn’t stand another scene. I can’t spoil everything now that it’s all right. Tomorrow. I will tell him tomorrow. Perhaps I won’t have it now… After all this. Perhaps all this crying and my illness will have upset everything. Oh, I wish I wasn’t pregnant… I wish I didn’t have to have it.. I wish… ‘

‘ No. That is wrong, dangerous. I couldn’t do it. I don’t even know who to go to. Jeremy might know. But I couldn’t. I don’t have the courage to do something like that. Yes I do… But I don’t want to. I want children. I wouldn’t risk not being able to have them. I want this one really…. Or I suppose I will when it comes. I don’t even feel as if I’m going to have a baby yet. I can’t really believe it’s true… Except when I’m sick. I was only sick this morning, but that may have been due to nerves after that awful night. Does Joey even know that I’m pregnant? Has Audrey told him? He must have known when I was sick every morning. He gave me something for it but it hasn’t done much good. I will go back to Cornwall if Jeremy doesn’t want me. I will tell him tomorrow and if he doesn’t want it, I will go back to Cornwall. Audrey will look after me. And Joey. Joey is a doctor and he understands human nature. After it is born I can get the child adopted. No, I couldn’t bear that. Not my child. Not Jeremy’s child. I will always want this child. And if I don’t have Jeremy, the child would be a part of him to keep forever. I want this baby ”

” Here is your drink darling. Are you feeling better? ” Jeremy said as he returned.

“Yes thank you. I’m terribly sorry Jeremy”

“You have been ill, Penny. Naturally you aren’t yourself yet. Come on darling, drink up”

She took the glass from him and sipped the water slowly, looking up at him shyly. He smiled back at her and held her other hand