From Bully To Beloved

“Sex complicates things,” I say.

“Boy, does it ever.”

Kelly is religious, but has had sex. A few times. When I first met her in Gwen’s secret creative writing book club, she had been torn between saving herself for marriage and her own urges. In the end, several months later, she decided to make her own decisions and concluded that she didn’t want to wait. Being her best friends, Gwen and I supported her completely.

“He’s not your bully anymore,” Kelly says. “Right? When I was young, Mom told me that bullies bully others because they feel bad about themselves. They try to get some sort of attention and power because they are helpless in their own sad lives. Of course, that’s not an excuse, but she said that eighty percent of our brains are developed by the time we’re five years old, and early childhood experiences shape us more than anything else. It’s tragic, really.”

Kelly’s words remind me of what Coltontold me when he briefly talked about his time growing up. The few things he mentioned were devastating, to say the least. He didn’t have a nice childhood. He had a horrible and sad youth.

“Okay, to be perfectly honest,” I say, “he was the bully who bullied the bullies. That’s why all the girls were so madly in love with him. I get that. That alone would have been so brave and admirable-but I was the one girl he pushed around and tried to intimidate in mean and yucky ways.”

“But you stood up to him, didn’t you? I can’t picture anybody bullying you, ever. Nobody has more backbone than you.”

Is that why we tangled with one another as kids?

He bullied mebecausehe was unhappy, and I was the one kid who stood up to him?

Something in me deflates.

Maybe he didn’t hate me. At least, not that much. Maybe I pushed his buttons like he did mine.

When she looks me in the eye and says, “Amen,” I know she knows exactly where I’m coming from. It’s what she says next that throws me for a loop. “You should do it.”

My eyes go wide. “Kelly?”

Always the caring friend, I realize I shouldn’t be too surprised by her response. However, this is the first time she’s ever told me to just up and sleep with someone.

Her cheeks turn pink. “If you’re attracted to this guy, I say go for it. He’s your husband. Also, he has really kind eyes.”

Shit, she’s got me there. “Technicallyyes. I mean, he is my husband. And yes, sometimes he’s…friendly. Even protective. Of me.” Okay, he’s annoying with his constant bickering about me working too much-it’s not like he works any less. But he was considerate enough to gift me an adjustable easel. In the fourteen days of our marriage, he has thought about me and my needs a thousand times more than my ex did in all the months of our relationship combined.

Kelly nods happily at my confession of Coltonhaving a good side too. “You’re allowed to have sex with your husband. Actually, it’s pretty much encouraged.”

I chuckle and take a big sip of coffee. Mmm, nothing beats coffee from a diner. I don’t care what any of those fancy coffee shops tell you.

Kelly sits next to me. “I’m going to ask you a question, and I want you to answer with the first thing that comes to mind. Don’t think, just speak. Are you attracted to him?”

I don’t have to think. “Yes.”

“Do you know if he’s attracted to you?”

Again, I don’t have to think. “He’s made it abundantly clear that he is.”

“Do you want him to spank your butt and call you princess?” The moment she says it, Kelly throws a hand over her mouth. I can’t help but laugh. Quickly, she says, “Sorry, that’s a line I read in a blog once back during our secret book club time. Somehow, it caught my attention. It just slipped out.”

Well, well, well. Still waters run deep.

I’m always thrilled when sweet, innocent Kelly comes out of her shell, especially now that it’s happening more and more often.

I don’t have to think. “Ah, girl, you have no idea, and the answer is:of course.”

Kelly titters. “There’s your answer.”

I take a deep breath. “Oh! I almost forgot, Kelly. I have something for you.” I pull out my phone and shoot her a quick text. “There. Don’t say I never did anything for you.”

“I would never say that.” Kelly laughs, checking her phone. “What did you just send me?”

“Justin’s number.”

Her cheeks turn bright red. “Justin’s number?”

“Yup.”

“As in the gorgeous guy who hangs out with your hubby?”Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.

I nod. “Yup, that’s the one. Apparently, he’s got a little crush on you. Coltontold him he’d pass his number along.”

“No way.” Kelly’s cheeks somehow grow even redder. “Oh, my gosh,” she says, staring at her phone with wide eyes. “Oh, mygosh.”

It’s so cute to watch her go from disbelieving to excited.

“A little crush on me? Are you sure that’s what he said?”

“Very sure. That’s what my hubby”-dammit-“I mean Cal, said he said.”